My Gluten-Free Story: Celiac Disease, Being “That Guy,” and Still Finding Great Food

My Life before the Diagnosis

I love food. Before 2019, the thought of eating something gluten-free on purpose would rarely come into my mind. If it did, it would be because I felt like I was being vaguely healthy. Like, when I would eat vegan or something like that.

I didn’t just eat things with gluten: I was obsessed with these things. I love beer (my favorite was Victory Golden Monkey), pizza, all bread (like, literally all bread), cake, pie, donuts. Oh, donuts. I love pasta and sandwiches and burritos and fish and chips.

OK, I have to stop or I’ll start to cry.

What the hell?

Early 2019, I started to feel not so well in my tummy. I’ll be frank: I was having near constant diarrhea. It wasn’t fun. I am not one of those people who don’t like doctors, but I also don’t go running to one at the first sign of something amiss. However, after a certain point, I needed to get some help.

I went to my doctor, and she ran some basic tests and nothing came back unordinary. That’s when she decided to do all of the tests.

The Diagnosis

Once the full gamut came back, it was obvious: I had Celiac disease. I think there was some scale that said that above something like 20, you probably had it, and my number was over 100. I remember that I was on a plane when I read the message, and I immediately downloaded a library book on Celiac disease and learned all I could — including that Celiac disease can develop in adults over 40 (ME).

The biopsy just confirmed what I already knew. I was diseased.

My Celiac Disease and Going Gluten-Free

My Celiac is different from everyone else’s, which is the way it goes with this stupid disease.

• I generally don’t suffer from cross-contamination. That is, I can eat french fries that were fried in a fryer that fried chicken tenders, for example.
• Little bits of gluten are tolerable — a drink of beer, a slice of pizza, a slice of cake — without everything falling apart.
• I only have tummy issues — not headaches, not skin problems — and they’re generally not horrible. I just may have to spend some time in the bathroom.

How I Deal with Going Gluten-Free — and Don’t

• I hate (hate) being the guy who has to cause a bother. However, this disease makes that almost inevitable, because I have to ask people whether there will be gluten-free options at catered events, for instance.
• Apps are the best (Find Me Gluten Free to the rescue!) and make a lot of lists when I am preparing to go to a new place so that I always have options.
• I tend to stick to familiar places nearby. Luckily, since being diagnosed, I have lived in two cities (DC and NYC) that have a lot of great options.

Do I wish I didn’t have this stupid disease? Absolutely. However, it has been (kind of) fun finding new places, new foods, new ways of doing things. I hope that here I can show you all of the things I find to make your experience better.